LEONATO Brief, I pray you; for you see it is a busy time with me.
DOGBERRY Marry, this it is, sir.
VERGES Yes, in truth it is, sir.
LEONATO What is it, my good friends?
DOGBERRY Goodman Verges, sir, speaks a little off the matter: an old man, sir, and his wits are not so blunt as, God help, I would desire they were; but, in faith, honest as the skin between his brows.
VERGES Yes, I thank God I am as honest as any man living that is an old man and no honester than I.
DOGBERRY Comparisons are odorous: palabras, neighbour Verges.
DOGBERRY It pleases your worship to say so, but we are the poor duke's officers; but truly, for mine own part, if I were as tedious as a king, I could find it in my heart to bestow it all of your worship.
LEONATO All thy tediousness on me, ah?
DOGBERRY Yea, an 'twere a thousand pound more than 'tis; for I hear as good exclamation on your worship as of any man in the city; and though I be but a poor man, I am glad to hear it.
VERGES And so am I.
LEONATO I would fain know what you have to say.
VERGES Marry, sir, our watch to-night, excepting your worship's presence, ha' ta'en a couple of as arrant knaves as any in Messina.
DOGBERRY A good old man, sir; he will be talking: as they say, when the age is in, the wit is out: God help us! it is a world to see. Well said, i' faith, neighbour Verges: well, God's a good man; an two men ride of a horse, one must ride behind. An honest soul, i' faith, sir; by my troth he is, as ever broke bread; but God is to be worshipped; all men are not alike; alas, good neighbour!
LEONATO Indeed, neighbour, he comes too short of you.
LEONATO Take their examination yourself and bring it me: I am now in great haste, as it may appear unto you.
DOGBERRY It shall be suffigance.
LEONATO Drink some wine ere you go: fare you well.
Enter a Messenger
MESSENGER My lord, they stay for you to give your daughter to her husband.
LEONATO I'll wait upon them: I am ready.
Exeunt LEONATO and Messenger
DOGBERRY Go, good partner, go, get you to Francis Seacole; bid him bring his pen and inkhorn to the gaol: we are now to examination these men.
VERGES And we must do it wisely.
DOGBERRY We will spare for no wit, I warrant you; here's that shall drive some of them to a non-come: only get the learned writer to set down our excommunication and meet me at the gaol.
Exeunt
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Dogberry and Verges barge in on Leonato, who is busy preparing for Hero’s wedding, to tell him in long, rambling detail about the arrest of Conrade and Borachio. Dogberry wants Leonato to sit in on his interrogation of the prisoners, but Leonato tells Dogberry to do it without him and fill him in later.