Carl Adamshick – Even though

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Even though you regretted sleeping
with him, you didn't regret sleeping with him.

Even though you loved him, you didn't love him.

You were trying, even though you knew you weren't trying.

You could see another world in this world,
even though you knew

there was only one world.


The street is doing that thing to the moon I like.
Birds have taken their paths through the trees.

May happiness be a wheel, a lit throne, spinning
in the vast pinprick of darkness.

We forget almost everything,
even though we believe we live to remember.

Oblivion and significance
brush our bones, leave us weeping for strangers.


May your secrets remain hidden
in that beautiful place covered in suffering.

I see loneliness
as a shell of mottled smoke in a high nest
of metal shavings, a cold

autumn day without wind, the sun unfolding
an ancient map on parched ground
we can't read, even though

our language comes from the earth.

I felt the deep bruise of a sentence
and wanted to eat
at the banquet of silence.


May betrayal be a way home;

the coming back, a burden of joy.
A general un-understanding has left me
both open and closed, overwhelmed
by the magnitude of the world's choices,

but also, at ease,
floating on the light wave of its being.

May the defilement of hope be a coronation,
May you wear the crown of exile.

May you forget what you hold dear.

Life is and cannot be
a failure

Hatred sleeps in the white blooming
lilac branch of the skull.

I live in my mother's maiden name.
I was taken in as an ocean
takes in daylight.

Mourn, if you must mourn,
feel loss as the only profund thing we share,

even though you believe
each of us is alone forever in an endless field
of carbon.


May the dice have no eyes
and may you keep throwing them on the table's
green velvet.


May you have night,
with its dark branches, every night.

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